I'm thankful that I managed to avoid a traffic ticket today. Allegedly I was going 29 mph over the speed limit.
Cop: Sir, Do you know you were speeding?
Me: Well... no I didn't sir... but honestly speaking.. Me speeding is the furthest from my mind right now.
Cop: Really. Then what the hell is on your mind son.
Me: I've been having the stomach flu for the past week. I've literally been on the toilet every other hour.
The cop proceeds to laugh and laugh. Tears rolling down his waxy mustache.
Cop: Get the hell out of here son.
So yes.. I am thankful that I avoided a speeding ticket today...but ow...my pride..
An Educated Guide To Speeding Tickets-How To Beat Avoid Them